When Forgiving Others is Hard


Finding the strength to let go and move forward

People we love the most can hurt us in the deepest way. Have you ever been there before? Are you there now? What do you typically do when someone you love or cared about cut you deep with hurtful words or actions? Do you lash out or give him or her a piece of your mind, or do you readily forgive?

You’re probably shouting – forgive?! But they hurt me! No doubt, forgiving those who have wronged us is far from easy. It’s downright, hard. Yet, God wants us to release the individual(s) and forgive.

The term itself means to stop feeling angry or resentful, pardon, cancel a debt, excuse and give up all acclaim on the account. Do you need to clear someone’s debt today? In other words, do you need to forgive someone who has trespassed against you? If so, pray and ask the Lord to help you overcome the hurt and release the person who hurt you without holding a grudge against them. The Bible tells us in Mark 11:25, “But when you are praying, first forgive anyone you are holding a grudge against, so that your Father in heaven will forgive your sins, too.”

It’s the familiar verse many people quote: “If you want to be forgiven, then you must forgive.” In all actuality, forgiveness is a big step towards freedom. It releases you and the other person from mental and emotional prison. It’s the key that unlocks the chains of bondage. So unlock everyone – including yourself. Choose to forgive lovingly.

Another key accompaniment to forgiveness is love. Proverbs 17:9 says, “Love prospers when a fault is forgiven, but dwelling on it separates the closest friends.” Harboring or incubating unforgiveness can ruin close relationships. It can also create a root of bitterness in your heart. This all stems from not releasing a fault against you. It’s not worth the anguish. Instead, pardon the wrongdoer, choose love and let it prosper over the grudge.

Again, forgiveness is a choice. It’s not an easy one, but it’s the best. It’s not worth your lack of peace, hindrance to your own need for forgiveness or loss of great relationships. So try everything within you not to dwell on past hurts or replay the wrongdoing over and over in your mind. Our great enemy Satan would love for you to dwell on the past or try to get even.

As an alternative, forgive, love, smile, wave, hug, be cordial and make things right in your relationships. Remember, resist the enemy and he will flee from you! Quickly run him off by yielding to God’s Word today. Choose forgiveness – even when it’s hard – so you can start moving forward again.